The first thing I want to say is that this isn't that bad. I have read worse. :-D
But some things that I reacted on reading the first part of the book. Then I stopped keeping notes :-D
It's just ridiculous. Christopher Paolini wrote better when he was 17.
Täh?
His brother doesn't want him to be involved in the investigation, so he keeps a clue hidden and goes finding it himself.
And even though he had never seen anything like this, he knows to hunt it in the forest. And finds it. And it's boa constructing a pine tree.
Er...
Vines don't work like that.
"Against his better judgment"?
Why was this?
He cut a plant and then put the stem back in the earth so that it might regrow itself?
Plants don't work like that.
He's supposed to be a forest guide?
They were stalking her- but what was it any of his business, he couldn't be sure, he didn't even have his knife with him.
Wow! Something sensible!
But -
Still winded from the previous run
How f-ing unfit is he?
What if they were siblings? They would laugh at him. And...?
No - they were stalking her, because he felt it.
"her brown hair was full, lush and long, complementing the contoures of her body".
What?
She didn't know the way, and has to turn often to know where to go, but he can't just go first.
"He saw the same cloud yesterday or was it the day before?"
He spots a cloud that looks exactly like a snake, and exactly like a cloud he saw previously, and he isn't much interested?
So, Terry Goodkind sees the same clouds over and over again, so that there's nothing interesting
"In that instant, he knew he was about to die"
No, he didn't. He didn't die.
Wasn't this girl on her way somewhere?
"Chase wore a brace of knives to one side of his belt, and a six-bladed battle mace to the other. The hilt of a short sword stood above his right shoulder, and a crossbow with a full complement of barbed, steel-tipped bolts hung from a leather strap on his left".
Oh, my.
Then the food... turkey?
WHERE is this place? It sounds like an American smalltown in modern times, and then like a medieval fantasy world with dragons and such, and... it is confusing and unsettling. I don't get a grip of this world.
But, Terry Goodkind said he doesn't do worldbuilding. No kidding.
She threw cheese on the floor.
I hate her. People who waste food are waste of space.
And then she says "I am still hungry. Could we have more?"
Why didn't she ask him to fetch her some ribs or sausages, that she could eat?
I hate this bitch.
Oh, this is priceless.
"There was a flash of angry intolerance in her green eyes. (he keeps reminding us of that her eyes are green. I'm starting to wonder if she has eyes that aren't green.)
Her voice came in a slow, harsh whisper. "When I left my homeland, five wizards cast spells over my tracks so none could know where I went, or follow, and then they killed themselves so they could not be made to talk!" Her teeth were gritted with anger, and her eyes were wet. She was starting to tremble."
In the middle of a party. This strong and stoic warrior woman...
The guard who stands outside the house, happens to stand straight outside the window they look at, and turn just at the moment they look at him, and wink at them. Excuse me, what?
Michael's speech doesn't make any sense.
"The audience was so moved that they stood in absolute silence. Richard saw men in tears, and women weeping openly".
So good he tells us this, because I'm not moved at all.
So... the guy drags the dad out and knocks off the lamp, and instead of lifting up the lamp and smothering the fire, the mother runs and rescues her children and then runs back in the house to fetch something and then runs around screaming while she burns alive.
Sounds more like a Sims I episode.
I don't understand why Richard is so upset. Everyone knows their mother died in the fire.
So, the First Councilor publicly gropes a guest? And nobody does anything? Such nice people.
"He wanted to run in the other direction, take them away from there, but he couldn't. He wasn't running away without the tooth his father had given him for safekeeping."
What tooth? And... why is it now suddenly all important? He left his home in the morning without these things, not giving them a second thought, but now it's really important. *sigh*
I guess it's the very thing the father got killed for.
Why did he give the tooth to Richard?
So - when introducing important objects to the story, mention it first as something minute, and make it appear as non-important as it is to Richard. His father often gave him things for safekeeping. Did he? Why would he do that? Richard is like 17 and has just moved to his own house which lies in middle of nowhere and has no protection whatsoever. Richard's father was a collector and merchant. He wouldn't give Richard anything "for safekeeping". It just doesn't make any sense.
And why did they break the windows? "The bedding was slashed open" - maybe they needed to see if he had hidden the thing inside the bedding
"Prized books were torn apart"
Ok... why?
"Below the window was the bedpost, and hanging from it were his pack and the leather thong with the tooth, right where he had left them"
So... they break open books, slash the bedding, but leave his "pack" untouched? Sure.
Also, his father died three weeks ago. He's a forest guide. He would NEVER leave his home without his things. Except that Terry Goodkind couldn't think of any other reason to why he would go to his house and not flee. I wish he had followed his instinct and realized this was a stupid, contrived thing.
So, back to the tooth.
"He never let anyone see the tooth; it was only for the keeper of the secret book to see."
But he let it hang on the bedpost totally open to anyone who came to his home.
Now, I am a person who doesn't wear jewelry or things like that. My husband is. And IF he removes things, which doesn't happen often - he puts them back as soon as possible after having done what ever was the reason to why he removed it. Now, I don't know what kind of tooth this is, because if Richard took it off overnight, it must be rather big and cumbersome, but if it really was that important to him, he would put it back on the minute he got up. The minute.
But - now Terry is talking about some "secret book".*sigh*
It wasn't the tooth, it was the book. OK.
"He put his other hand gently on her back to move her along".
WHAT THE FUCK FOR? She is fully capable of moving on her own! WTF is his problem? He needs to go first, to show her the way. Nice forest guide he is. Though I think it's just because she's a woman. He would probably just lead like a normal person if he was "leading" a man.
"Something inside him had strongly warned him to get away. He gave himself a mental shake. He was letting his imagination have too free a rein. Of course something inside had warned him of danger, warned him to get away. He had already gotten away with his life when he shouldn't have once this day. It was foolish to trust in luck once; twice was arrogance of the worst kind. It was best to walk away".
But... he didn't. He marched straight (or zigzagged) to the house to fetch this "tooth".
"What was it? It was my backpack. I had to get my backpack".
She turned to face him with both hands on her hips and a scowl on her face. "Richard Cypher, you expect me to believe you risked your life to get your backpack?"
"Kahlan, you are coming close to getting kicked." He couldn't manage a smile.
She's 100% correct. And you are lying to her.
What's with these vampire flies? Oh, I see. They are Gar's. Well... nice beast. It eats a rabbit, and seems to be totally fine with that, and flies away.
"Against the failing light, Richard could see the veins pulsing through the thin membranes that were its wings."
They are in the middle of the forest, sun is going down - not likely he can see anything. But it sounds... something.
Bats can be killed if their wings rip because they will bleed out. I wonder if Terry mentions the veins in the wings because he is going to use this to kill the beast when it fights Richard. That would be cool. (He doesn't. There is no reason what so ever for him to mention that detail.)
Why doesn't Kahlan have any camping equipment or any hunting equipment or anything with her?
And why does Richard have a blanket in his backpack? Sounds like Hermione's bag.
Oh, my...
there's the blanket
there's a cooking pot
theres a pouch of dried vegetables
there's a napkin with four fat sausaged (which he apparently took from the party... oh my)
"A good woodsman," he said, licking his fingers and looking up at her, "always plans ahead and tries to know where his next meal will come from."
Let's see if Terry remembers this further on in the book.
There's spices.
There's a spoon.
"Clouds scudded across the moon, and they could see their breath in the cold air."
Handy. But... when was this supposed to be happening? Oh, it's Autumn. Ok... I accept it's freezing outside.
Even more weird that Kahlan didn't prepare for camping.
I like the "wayward pines" :-D
Handy.
"The most ruthless of the D'Haran rulers was Panis Rahl. He was avaricious."
Giggle. No-one speaks like that.
(I wonder about these names... I wonder what they are based on. My theory - based on what I have read online, not on the book - that this is heavily based on Robert Jordan and Michael Moorcock. Some Conan Barbarian thrown in. I need to read more Elric and Conan to be able to judge that, but right now that's my impression. So I assume the names are inspired by the names in those books as well...)
Uh.
"What kind of magic? What did he do?"
"Some was trickery, sickness, fevers, but the worst of it was the shadow people."
Richard frowned. "Shadow people? What were they?"
"Shadows in the air. Shadow people had no solid form, no precise shape, they were not even alive as we know it, but beings created out of magic." She held out her hand, gliding it across in front of them. "They would come floating across a field or through a wood. Weapons had no effect on them. Swords and arrows went through them as if they were nothing more than smoke. You couldn't hide; shadow people could see you anywhere. One would drift right up to a person and touch him. The touch caused the person's whole body to blister and swell and finally split open. No one touched by a shadow person ever survived. Whole battalions were found killed to a man." She pulled her hand back inside the blanket.
"When Panis Rahl started using the magic in that way, a great and honorable wizard joined the side of the Midlands cause."
"What was his name, this great and honorable wizard?"
"That is part of the story. Have patience until I get to it."
Oh, Zedd.
By the way, she doesn't know his name. He wiped off the memory of his name and face from everyone. Why she couldn't tell this, beats me.It would have been better to say "What was his name?" "No-one knows"
Even though the scene of Kahlan losing herself to the Underworld is very impressive and so, it doesn't make any sense. "Tell me what you saw there", he says, and within seconds she's hyperventilating and crying and behaving in a way that makes me not believe for one second she actually managed to get through the boundary. If the mere memory makes her lose her shit in seconds, how the heck could she have managed to survive two days, and then be totally sane and strong and present the next day, when Richard spotted her? And she isn't presented as this hysterical girl any other time, except when Terry needs Richard to save her.
Oh, and I have read Ayn Rand, too. Kahlan's story is a rather good description of a Randian dysfunctional society. Terry isn't a total idiot.
"They made a political appointment of a very important position that was a wizard's and a wizard's alone to fill. He was furious, he told them the position was one for which only a wizard could find the right person, and the appointment only a wizard's to make."
Seriously?
"When I start the process of writing down the story, I understand completely the theme, the plot and the characters. When you do understand these elements, every passage of your novel, every sentence, will contribute meaningfully to those three elements."
Yeah...
I wonder how far in her story she has to get before Richard makes the unavoidable connection between Michael's speech and Darken Rand? Oh... he doesn't. And Kahlan doesn't either. Isn't that just nice. :-D Sorry, Terry, but keeping people stupid to make the revelation bigger and more shocking only makes people seem stupid. It's obvious what's happening.
I'm fed up with all these people crying all the time. Michael obviously can turn on the waterworks by command, but Richard is weeping like a premenstrual woman.
Then we have the wisp. Cute. I'm glad Kahlan didn't play the "I can't grant you the only thing you have ever asked of me because it hurts me" game.
"After the thunder without sound, Richard waited for a time"
Thunder is the sound lightning makes.
Why would he have waited? The forest is full of things he has never experienced before, they are in grave danger, I would have rushed in to save the damsel, because I feared she was under attack.
"He nodded and, taking her arm, led her to the mat of dry grass and laid her down."
Why? Why, Terry, do you make your heroine a... Uh. Maybe she just is an idiot in everything except some things. Most people are. I would have wanted her to be a bit more... a lot more self-sufficient.
"He sensed it, too. Something was coming for them. Something deadly."
Yeah. Shar just told you.
It's so nice the thorn didn't ache or draw any attention until necessary.
So... they are running from this terrible threat, and Kahlan stops making flower arrangements.
"A single plank from the sod-covered roof served as a ramp for his old cat, who was better at getting up than down."
Oh!
This cat and everything related to the cat was the best part of this book.
"Darken Rahl, son of Panis Rahl, has put the three boxes of Orden in play,"Kahlan said simply. "I have come in search of the great wizard."
Richard was thunderstruck. From the secret book, the Book of Counted Shadows, the book his father had had him commit to memory before they destroyed it, the line jumped into his mind: And when the three boxes of Orden are put into play, the snake vine shall grow. Richard's worst nightmares - everyone's worst nightmares - were coming to pass
Uh. Of course. How did they know the book was secret? Why did the father make the son memorize the book? Why did they destroy it? What's with the tooth? I suppose we'll find out.
But I hate the "no-one tells me anything about the history". Why? To keep him ignorant.
It would be better to keep him educated of at least some of it, to make him able to verify the information he hears. It really is unforgivable for the father not educating his sons.
Ok, so that's the story of the book. Cool.
I like that she doesn't promise. Good.
"Darken Rahl has put the three boxes of Orden into play" just sounds so silly.
https://www.neogaf.com/threads/the-sword-of-truth-is-some-of-the-worst-literature-ive-ever-read.428839/page-12
http://cgi1.usatoday.com/mchat/20030805003/tscript.htm
But some things that I reacted on reading the first part of the book. Then I stopped keeping notes :-D
It's just ridiculous. Christopher Paolini wrote better when he was 17.
Täh?
His brother doesn't want him to be involved in the investigation, so he keeps a clue hidden and goes finding it himself.
And even though he had never seen anything like this, he knows to hunt it in the forest. And finds it. And it's boa constructing a pine tree.
Er...
Vines don't work like that.
"Against his better judgment"?
Why was this?
He cut a plant and then put the stem back in the earth so that it might regrow itself?
Plants don't work like that.
He's supposed to be a forest guide?
They were stalking her- but what was it any of his business, he couldn't be sure, he didn't even have his knife with him.
Wow! Something sensible!
But -
Still winded from the previous run
How f-ing unfit is he?
What if they were siblings? They would laugh at him. And...?
No - they were stalking her, because he felt it.
"her brown hair was full, lush and long, complementing the contoures of her body".
What?
She didn't know the way, and has to turn often to know where to go, but he can't just go first.
"He saw the same cloud yesterday or was it the day before?"
He spots a cloud that looks exactly like a snake, and exactly like a cloud he saw previously, and he isn't much interested?
So, Terry Goodkind sees the same clouds over and over again, so that there's nothing interesting
"In that instant, he knew he was about to die"
No, he didn't. He didn't die.
Wasn't this girl on her way somewhere?
"Chase wore a brace of knives to one side of his belt, and a six-bladed battle mace to the other. The hilt of a short sword stood above his right shoulder, and a crossbow with a full complement of barbed, steel-tipped bolts hung from a leather strap on his left".
Oh, my.
Then the food... turkey?
WHERE is this place? It sounds like an American smalltown in modern times, and then like a medieval fantasy world with dragons and such, and... it is confusing and unsettling. I don't get a grip of this world.
But, Terry Goodkind said he doesn't do worldbuilding. No kidding.
She threw cheese on the floor.
I hate her. People who waste food are waste of space.
And then she says "I am still hungry. Could we have more?"
Why didn't she ask him to fetch her some ribs or sausages, that she could eat?
I hate this bitch.
Oh, this is priceless.
"There was a flash of angry intolerance in her green eyes. (he keeps reminding us of that her eyes are green. I'm starting to wonder if she has eyes that aren't green.)
Her voice came in a slow, harsh whisper. "When I left my homeland, five wizards cast spells over my tracks so none could know where I went, or follow, and then they killed themselves so they could not be made to talk!" Her teeth were gritted with anger, and her eyes were wet. She was starting to tremble."
In the middle of a party. This strong and stoic warrior woman...
The guard who stands outside the house, happens to stand straight outside the window they look at, and turn just at the moment they look at him, and wink at them. Excuse me, what?
Michael's speech doesn't make any sense.
"The audience was so moved that they stood in absolute silence. Richard saw men in tears, and women weeping openly".
So good he tells us this, because I'm not moved at all.
So... the guy drags the dad out and knocks off the lamp, and instead of lifting up the lamp and smothering the fire, the mother runs and rescues her children and then runs back in the house to fetch something and then runs around screaming while she burns alive.
Sounds more like a Sims I episode.
I don't understand why Richard is so upset. Everyone knows their mother died in the fire.
So, the First Councilor publicly gropes a guest? And nobody does anything? Such nice people.
"He wanted to run in the other direction, take them away from there, but he couldn't. He wasn't running away without the tooth his father had given him for safekeeping."
What tooth? And... why is it now suddenly all important? He left his home in the morning without these things, not giving them a second thought, but now it's really important. *sigh*
I guess it's the very thing the father got killed for.
Why did he give the tooth to Richard?
So - when introducing important objects to the story, mention it first as something minute, and make it appear as non-important as it is to Richard. His father often gave him things for safekeeping. Did he? Why would he do that? Richard is like 17 and has just moved to his own house which lies in middle of nowhere and has no protection whatsoever. Richard's father was a collector and merchant. He wouldn't give Richard anything "for safekeeping". It just doesn't make any sense.
And why did they break the windows? "The bedding was slashed open" - maybe they needed to see if he had hidden the thing inside the bedding
"Prized books were torn apart"
Ok... why?
"Below the window was the bedpost, and hanging from it were his pack and the leather thong with the tooth, right where he had left them"
So... they break open books, slash the bedding, but leave his "pack" untouched? Sure.
Also, his father died three weeks ago. He's a forest guide. He would NEVER leave his home without his things. Except that Terry Goodkind couldn't think of any other reason to why he would go to his house and not flee. I wish he had followed his instinct and realized this was a stupid, contrived thing.
So, back to the tooth.
"He never let anyone see the tooth; it was only for the keeper of the secret book to see."
But he let it hang on the bedpost totally open to anyone who came to his home.
Now, I am a person who doesn't wear jewelry or things like that. My husband is. And IF he removes things, which doesn't happen often - he puts them back as soon as possible after having done what ever was the reason to why he removed it. Now, I don't know what kind of tooth this is, because if Richard took it off overnight, it must be rather big and cumbersome, but if it really was that important to him, he would put it back on the minute he got up. The minute.
But - now Terry is talking about some "secret book".*sigh*
It wasn't the tooth, it was the book. OK.
"He put his other hand gently on her back to move her along".
WHAT THE FUCK FOR? She is fully capable of moving on her own! WTF is his problem? He needs to go first, to show her the way. Nice forest guide he is. Though I think it's just because she's a woman. He would probably just lead like a normal person if he was "leading" a man.
"Something inside him had strongly warned him to get away. He gave himself a mental shake. He was letting his imagination have too free a rein. Of course something inside had warned him of danger, warned him to get away. He had already gotten away with his life when he shouldn't have once this day. It was foolish to trust in luck once; twice was arrogance of the worst kind. It was best to walk away".
But... he didn't. He marched straight (or zigzagged) to the house to fetch this "tooth".
"What was it? It was my backpack. I had to get my backpack".
She turned to face him with both hands on her hips and a scowl on her face. "Richard Cypher, you expect me to believe you risked your life to get your backpack?"
"Kahlan, you are coming close to getting kicked." He couldn't manage a smile.
She's 100% correct. And you are lying to her.
What's with these vampire flies? Oh, I see. They are Gar's. Well... nice beast. It eats a rabbit, and seems to be totally fine with that, and flies away.
They are in the middle of the forest, sun is going down - not likely he can see anything. But it sounds... something.
Bats can be killed if their wings rip because they will bleed out. I wonder if Terry mentions the veins in the wings because he is going to use this to kill the beast when it fights Richard. That would be cool. (He doesn't. There is no reason what so ever for him to mention that detail.)
Why doesn't Kahlan have any camping equipment or any hunting equipment or anything with her?
And why does Richard have a blanket in his backpack? Sounds like Hermione's bag.
Oh, my...
there's the blanket
there's a cooking pot
theres a pouch of dried vegetables
there's a napkin with four fat sausaged (which he apparently took from the party... oh my)
"A good woodsman," he said, licking his fingers and looking up at her, "always plans ahead and tries to know where his next meal will come from."
Let's see if Terry remembers this further on in the book.
There's spices.
There's a spoon.
"Clouds scudded across the moon, and they could see their breath in the cold air."
Handy. But... when was this supposed to be happening? Oh, it's Autumn. Ok... I accept it's freezing outside.
Even more weird that Kahlan didn't prepare for camping.
I like the "wayward pines" :-D
Handy.
"The most ruthless of the D'Haran rulers was Panis Rahl. He was avaricious."
Giggle. No-one speaks like that.
(I wonder about these names... I wonder what they are based on. My theory - based on what I have read online, not on the book - that this is heavily based on Robert Jordan and Michael Moorcock. Some Conan Barbarian thrown in. I need to read more Elric and Conan to be able to judge that, but right now that's my impression. So I assume the names are inspired by the names in those books as well...)
Uh.
"What kind of magic? What did he do?"
"Some was trickery, sickness, fevers, but the worst of it was the shadow people."
Richard frowned. "Shadow people? What were they?"
"Shadows in the air. Shadow people had no solid form, no precise shape, they were not even alive as we know it, but beings created out of magic." She held out her hand, gliding it across in front of them. "They would come floating across a field or through a wood. Weapons had no effect on them. Swords and arrows went through them as if they were nothing more than smoke. You couldn't hide; shadow people could see you anywhere. One would drift right up to a person and touch him. The touch caused the person's whole body to blister and swell and finally split open. No one touched by a shadow person ever survived. Whole battalions were found killed to a man." She pulled her hand back inside the blanket.
"When Panis Rahl started using the magic in that way, a great and honorable wizard joined the side of the Midlands cause."
"What was his name, this great and honorable wizard?"
"That is part of the story. Have patience until I get to it."
Oh, Zedd.
By the way, she doesn't know his name. He wiped off the memory of his name and face from everyone. Why she couldn't tell this, beats me.It would have been better to say "What was his name?" "No-one knows"
Even though the scene of Kahlan losing herself to the Underworld is very impressive and so, it doesn't make any sense. "Tell me what you saw there", he says, and within seconds she's hyperventilating and crying and behaving in a way that makes me not believe for one second she actually managed to get through the boundary. If the mere memory makes her lose her shit in seconds, how the heck could she have managed to survive two days, and then be totally sane and strong and present the next day, when Richard spotted her? And she isn't presented as this hysterical girl any other time, except when Terry needs Richard to save her.
Oh, and I have read Ayn Rand, too. Kahlan's story is a rather good description of a Randian dysfunctional society. Terry isn't a total idiot.
"They made a political appointment of a very important position that was a wizard's and a wizard's alone to fill. He was furious, he told them the position was one for which only a wizard could find the right person, and the appointment only a wizard's to make."
Seriously?
"When I start the process of writing down the story, I understand completely the theme, the plot and the characters. When you do understand these elements, every passage of your novel, every sentence, will contribute meaningfully to those three elements."
Yeah...
I wonder how far in her story she has to get before Richard makes the unavoidable connection between Michael's speech and Darken Rand? Oh... he doesn't. And Kahlan doesn't either. Isn't that just nice. :-D Sorry, Terry, but keeping people stupid to make the revelation bigger and more shocking only makes people seem stupid. It's obvious what's happening.
I'm fed up with all these people crying all the time. Michael obviously can turn on the waterworks by command, but Richard is weeping like a premenstrual woman.
Then we have the wisp. Cute. I'm glad Kahlan didn't play the "I can't grant you the only thing you have ever asked of me because it hurts me" game.
"After the thunder without sound, Richard waited for a time"
Thunder is the sound lightning makes.
Why would he have waited? The forest is full of things he has never experienced before, they are in grave danger, I would have rushed in to save the damsel, because I feared she was under attack.
"He nodded and, taking her arm, led her to the mat of dry grass and laid her down."
Why? Why, Terry, do you make your heroine a... Uh. Maybe she just is an idiot in everything except some things. Most people are. I would have wanted her to be a bit more... a lot more self-sufficient.
"He sensed it, too. Something was coming for them. Something deadly."
Yeah. Shar just told you.
It's so nice the thorn didn't ache or draw any attention until necessary.
So... they are running from this terrible threat, and Kahlan stops making flower arrangements.
"A single plank from the sod-covered roof served as a ramp for his old cat, who was better at getting up than down."
Oh!
This cat and everything related to the cat was the best part of this book.
"Darken Rahl, son of Panis Rahl, has put the three boxes of Orden in play,"Kahlan said simply. "I have come in search of the great wizard."
Richard was thunderstruck. From the secret book, the Book of Counted Shadows, the book his father had had him commit to memory before they destroyed it, the line jumped into his mind: And when the three boxes of Orden are put into play, the snake vine shall grow. Richard's worst nightmares - everyone's worst nightmares - were coming to pass
Uh. Of course. How did they know the book was secret? Why did the father make the son memorize the book? Why did they destroy it? What's with the tooth? I suppose we'll find out.
But I hate the "no-one tells me anything about the history". Why? To keep him ignorant.
It would be better to keep him educated of at least some of it, to make him able to verify the information he hears. It really is unforgivable for the father not educating his sons.
Ok, so that's the story of the book. Cool.
I like that she doesn't promise. Good.
"Darken Rahl has put the three boxes of Orden into play" just sounds so silly.
You can't be fucking serious...
https://www.neogaf.com/threads/the-sword-of-truth-is-some-of-the-worst-literature-ive-ever-read.428839/page-12
http://cgi1.usatoday.com/mchat/20030805003/tscript.htm
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